And here I sit, hoping that voicing some of my feelings will be therapy to my broken heart. “Man,” you might say, “that sounds so dramatic!” And indeed it may, but life is made up of little dramas, and sometimes the climax of the act is brokenness.

Every now and then life throws a curveball where too many things, change too quickly, all at the same time. I have yet to meet a person that is 100% comfortable with change. Some handle change better than others, but deep down (I think) everyone is rather shy for major changes in their life. I know that the saying, “A change is as good as new”, and sometimes this is true. But only sometimes.

Recently I have experienced many changes, the majority of which have included people close to me, and people I consider friends. The changes I am referring to is that many of my friends have left my immediate and familiar environment (mainly work), and it has left me rather unsettled. Some have relocated to different cities, and some have simply made a career move, and for some it seems circumstances beyond their control have necessitated a shift. It is the last group that has left me heartbroken. It is one thing to experience change because of a conscious choice by oneself, yet a totally different matter when change is “forced”. This is traumatic for the person as well as the people around them. Unfortunately forced change is brought about by people, often bereft of compassion and empathy. Hence this type of change is more often than experienced negatively.

So, now the question really is how to deal with change, whether voluntary or forced. In essence one needs to adopt the motto that “The only constant is change” and proceed from there. We have the choice to make anything out of life that we want. We have the power to channel our energy (time & effort) towards anything either positively or negatively. Since one cannot fight bad with bad (or in other words, a philosophy of an eye for an eye), one should adopt the strategy of fighting bad with good. This always requires a sacrifice on our parts, e.g. the sacrifice of “getting even” or the sacrifice of not giving in to discouragement and depression.

A broken heart can heal, and stand in the future as a life lesson learnt, or even as a character building experience to make us stronger in the future. Amazingly, humans are extremely adaptable. So let us take this extraordinary ability to adapt and apply it to the fact that change will always be with us, and perhaps, just maybe, we will find negative change can be turned upside down to ultimately be a positive thing in our lives.

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